What to love and when to let go?

Do you remember all those rain and fire you have walked through, when you doubt you could make it but still you survived somehow? You let the debris and stone hit you hard because you thought it would only make you stronger. You endure the highs and lows life has to offer, just to get a taste of pleasure. But you suffer more instead. So, till when are we going to let these supernatural control us?

I have managed to keep myself stay corrected all this while. I can barely remember when the last time something pissed me off was. I was a calm lady. But yesterday, my last string snapped. I was in fume. Once you ignite me, nothing can kill those flames. Honestly, how could someone be so heartless? His actions don’t match his real age. He is inhuman, the most inhuman person I ever met.

For once, an innocent girl like me felt like killing was the only option. Stabbing someone with a dagger would lead to satisfaction. I hate having to fight with someone unreasonable. When I don’t speak up and just go with the flow, people say I don’t have a mind of my own and is being too dependable on others. When I start making my own decision and reasoning out, people start saying that I am trying to take control and be superior.

I bet you are now going to tell me off and say not to mind about what others have got to say about me. But think for a bit, when you are being judged, there is no way you can just keep still and not fight for your rights. I did just as so even though I know things might get worse. Why, why does something stupid like this have to happen when your life was just going on fine? Fuck all this bullshit. I am going to make it, through all of this, just like I always do in the past.

Alone.

I AM SO READY FOR SCHOOL BREAK! ARE YOU?
Khairiya xx

Before I met you, I wondered why all the lyrics in love songs were so exaggerated. Why do lyricists create such mushy and over-emotional sentences? Why can’t they just write a good melody without those melodramatic lyrics, which only I find is plain exaggeration? Before I fell in love with you, I thought romance novels were just so silly: Why would a person cry for another person for hours? How could a person wait for his or her lover for years? That is plain silliness. Before we became a couple, I thought romance movies were just so stupid. How could a person love another person so deeply that it became an obsession? How could one sacrifice so much, even to the extent of his or her own life, for his or her lover? Once again, only I find it plain stupidity.

When I realized I had fallen so deeply in love with you, I finally understood that songs, novels and movies are just reflections of life, inspired by the writer’s true stories. Then I realized our story mirrors a love song that I once heard, a romance novel I once read and a romance movie we once watched. Some things should be seen with your hearts and not only your eyes. It takes more than your sight to be able to see things clearly or rather what, a clear entire picture. I love you.

Khairiya xx